We sent Timothy

We sent Timothy...to strengthen and encourage you in your faith... 1 Thessalonians 3:2

Last night, we were in a meeting with a couple and we were going over an exercise of "unmet expectations." The exercise lists about 15 statements that some people believe are true. In the exercise, each partner must put a "T" next to any statement they think is true and then we discuss it. One of the statements that always stands out to me is, "If I have to ask, it's not as meaningful." Now, I understand, people aren't mind readers, but at the same time, if you knew me very well and cared for my needs, for the most part, I feel that person should be able to pick out what I need or would desire and I shouldn't have to ask. Granted, I understand that puts a lot of pressure on the other person, but this is a statement I struggle with.

So, with that in mind, there was an event that happened about 6 to 8 months ago and a friend, whom I felt should have been there for me, wasn't. Well, another friend of mine who had been there in other ways kept apologizing to me for not being there in the way that I expected my first friend to be there. I don't know if you do this, but I tend to fit my friends into certain categories based upon their personalities. Certain friends are phone call friends, others are hang out friends, with some friends you show up with a Dr. Pepper and chocolate, with others you offer to clean, etc., etc. My friends have categories. Well, my friend who kept apologizing didn't fit into the other friend's category and my apologizing friend knew that I was hurt by my other friend.

Until I read that scripture this morning, I never understood why my one friend kept apologizing to me. "So when we could stand it no longer, we thought it best to be left by ourselves in Athens. We sent Timothy, who is our brother and God's fellow worker in spreading the gospel of Christ, to strengthen and encourage you in your faith, so that no one would be unsettled by these trials," (1 Thessalonians 3:1-3). In the structure of our church, leaders are not left to stand on their own. We have more than one pastor, more than one small group coach, more than one small group leader, and more than one church member. In Noah's day, all the animals traveled in pairs. In marriage, you travel in pairs. It's not considered a "friendship" if there is only one.

I later discovered, after my trial had ended, that my friend who could not be there for me was undergoing her own heavy trial, but didn't tell me and wouldn't let anyone else tell me. But what she did do for me, was she sent me her friend--who was my friend, too--so that I would still be encouraged. The Bible says, "Two are better than one...If one falls down, his friend can help him up," (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10). That's what my friend did for me and what Paul did through Timothy for the Thessalonians. I pray that you have someone who will do that for you.

Resolution or Vision?

Do you know the difference between a vision, a dream, and a resolution? A resolution--usually something made on New Year's Day for the coming year--is, "the act of resolving or determining upon an action or course of action; the mental state or quality of being resolved," (Dictionary.com). How many people have made a New Year's Resolution? Come on, let me see your hands (yep, mine's up, too). Now, how many are still carrying out their resolutions? I see a lot fewer hands. Statistics say that "40-45% of adults make one or more resolutions or goals for themselves. Research shows...[of the 40-45% only] 46% make it past 6 months," (Articlesbase, 22, Nov. 2009). So why do we keep making resolutions if we can't keep them? I think the answer is in the question. It's because we can't keep them that we keep making them. We think that one of these years we will succeed. I think another part of the answer is in the definition. The definition says that a resolution is a "mental state" or "determining." It's like willing yourself to get up in the morning (30 minutes earlier) to exercise. If your only hope is "willing" yourself, you probably won't make it past the first two weeks. So, how do you make something stick?

What about a dream? According to Cinderella, "A dream is a wish your heart makes," (Walt Disney's Cinderella, 2005). For some, their dreams come true and not for others. How is a dream different from a resolution? A dream is, "an aspiration; goal; aim; a wild or vain fancy; to see or imagine in sleep or in a vision," (Dictionary.com). So why do some dreams come true and some dreams not? Let's come back to that.

Last, but not least, a vision is, "an experience in which a personage, thing, or event appears vividly or credibly to the mind, although not actually present, often under the influence of a divine or other agency," (Dictionary.com). What does the Bible say about visions? "Where there is no vision, the people perish," (Proverbs 29:18). "Write the vision, and make [it] plain upon tables, that he may run that readeth it," (Habakkuk 2:2). "That he may run," is the difference between the vision, the dream, and the resolution succeeding. There is nothing wrong with having big dreams. In fact, our pastors encourage us to dream big dreams for God. They encourage you to do that, because if your dreams are only little, you may think that you caused them to come true. Mark Batterson said that God likes impossible odds, (see In a Pit with a Lion, ch. 2). I believe that's true and that's why we need to have more than a heart-wish and more than a mental determination. If all we have to lean on are those two things, then when trouble comes, we'll abandon our dream or resolution. But, if this is a vision, from God, that we've written on our hearts and sewn into the weave of our lives, then we will find the strength to see it through to completion, even in the face of impossible odds. "Though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come..." (Habakkuk 2:3). This year, don't make a New Year's Resolution...make a God vision and write it down, so that you will keep running after it.

Red Words

My sheep recognize my voice, John 10:27, NLT.

Did you ever wonder why, when Jesus talks in the gospels, the words are in red? It was done so that we would get to know the color of the Lord's voice. People say to pay attention to the red words. In fact, even Brooks & Dunn make mention of it in their song, Believe. The lyrics say, "I raise my hands and bow my head. I'm finding more and more truth to the words written in red. They tell me that there's more to life than just what I can see. Oh, I believe." The line, "They tell me that there's more," is accurate. The red words are a visual practice. There are many sounds and voices in the world, all vying for your attention. If the voice of the Lord is generally a whisper and we are not accustomed to listening for it, how will we ever know what it sounds like, (see 1 Kings 19:12).

The Bible says that if we are His sheep, then we will recognize His voice. I think recognition takes practice and it takes knowing. I also think it depends upon the individual. Did you ever notice that the Lord speaks to many different people in many different ways? He speaks to some through writing and some through speaking and some through songs and some through the written word. We all learn and understand in different ways. The Lord designed us that way and so He will communicate to us, individually.

The Lord said He wanted us to recognize the color and tone of His voice and He is always speaking to us. He can be heard in a hurricane and in the falling of the winter snow. He will speak to the single mom and the stay-at-home mom. He will speak to the childless and the mother of seven. He will speak to the rock star and the aspiring artist. He will speak at the top, in the middle, and on the bottom rung of the corporate ladder. He speaks to the team player and to the soloist. He speaks to the well-loved child and the fatherless. He speaks to proud parents and worried parents. He speaks to Olympic champs and kids goofing off. He speaks to the 80 year old and the infant. He speaks to the widow and the widower. He speaks to the wealthy and the homeless. He speaks to those in prison and to those who are free. He speaks to those who are in debt and to those who are not. He speaks to you and your brother, to your father and your mother. He speaks to them all. The only difference: who's listening? Who knows and can see the tone and color of His voice? He said, I'm in the red words. Look for me in the red words. My sheep know my voice and they follow me.

Who I Am

I am
a daughter of the King,
an heir to riches and treasures stored up in heaven,
and a descendant of Abraham.

I am
a child of God,
a wife,
and a daughter, granddaughter, sister, and friend.

I am
saved by grace,
forgiven of my sins,
reborn of the blood,
baptized in water,
and loved by Him who sits at the right hand of the Father.

I am
a princess in the Kingdom of God,
a survivor,
a victor,
and an overcomer.

I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.

Who You Are

"Live like you know who you are." That's what Dale Brooks said in his sermon this past weekend. I wrote a poem a few years ago, stating who I am. I know I don't always act like I know who I am. But, the more I say it, the more I believe it and the more I act like I know who I am. The thing is, when Dale Brooks made that statement and asked the question, "Who are you," I was aware that my husband knew.

Brad & I have been on a long journey. You see, since the beginning of our relationship and especially since we've been married, I wanted Brad to act a certain way. I wanted him to be the head of the household; I wanted him to take charge or at least help with the finances. I wanted him to lead and do all the things the Bible said he should do. The biggest problem, I later discovered, was that I was doing them. Now, I already knew that I liked to be in charge and I liked to be in control. The problem was that I wasn't filling my role, and instead, I had taken over Brad's. There was no room for him to be the man he was supposed to be, because I was running the show.

The first small group that I ever lead was Power of a Praying Wife, by Stormie O'Martian. A friend of mine is leading it now and I pray that she continues to change lives through it. I know that I changed at least one woman's life: mine. It wasn't right away, but it gave me some tools that I put away. In fact, as Brad and I went along, we both picked up some more tools that helped to shape our marriage to more resemble the design that God had for us.

In April, 2009, God added another tool. Brad was in the emergency room with what later turned out to be bronchial pneumonia. I sat next to him while they gave him breathing treatments to see what would help. While we waited, I was reading In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day, by Mark Batterson. It just so happened that I was at a point in the book that suggested it was time to face and embrace my biggest fear (see Chapter 3). Let me tell you, that was not what I wanted to hear.

A day later, on April 22, 2009, when I was at home by myself and Brad was in the hospital, I called one of my friends and cried as I told her what I read. I knew exactly what my biggest fear was and there was no way that I wanted to embrace it, even in a small dose, as the book suggested, (p 50). My biggest fear was that everything we had fought for would be taken away from us and our relationship would go back to the way it was in the beginning. My wise and wonderful friend said that maybe God was using this sickness in order that Brad may be tested to see who he believed his Provider to be. And maybe He was using the length of the illness and the time away from work to show me that Brad was becoming the spiritual leader that I had been wanting him to become--the spiritual leader that God designed him to be.

That brings me to about a week ago. In the evening after work, we were taking a walk through our neighborhood. I'll spare you the details of why Brad was mad at me (though I'll admit it was something I said). And the point isn't that he got mad, but it's what he said when he got mad. He said that he was the priest of our family, the spiritual leader of our household, and I needed to listen when he talked because his thoughts were valid. I was totally blown away. I had never heard him talk like that before. I was sorry that he was mad at me, but I was thrilled that he knew who he was.

This past weekend, Dale Brooks said, "you must know who you are...You are salt and light...filled with all spiritual blessings...[and] God is on the inside." He asked an important question: Who are you?

Content Christmas

Living in Florida at Christmastime has never been the same as living in Wisconsin. For as many years as I can remember, we always had snow for Christmas (in Wisconsin). It wasn't always snowing on Christmas, but at least there was always snow on the ground. But when it did snow for Christmas, especially on Christmas Eve, it was magical. Light fluffy snow drifting to the ground was signature Christmas.

On our way home tonight, from a family get-together, we were listening to the new Chris Tomlin CD. The song, "Winter Snow" was playing as we turned the corner near our house. Icicle lights, hung on the houses, caught my eye as the song continued to play. There was something gentle about the soft glow of the lights and the melody of the music. The combination wrapped around my heart and I felt the glow of content Christmas. Paul said, "I have learned to be content...I have learned the secret," (Philippians 4:11-12). Contentment is not millions of toys or hoards of money. Contentment is a feeling inside that no one can steal from you. I don't know if I can explain the feeling, but when you have it, you know it's there.

The song, "Winter Snow," describes how Jesus came to the earth, "like a winter snow." That's how I feel my contentment to be tonight. It's like sitting by the fireside, watching the fall of the winter snow, "quiet and soft and slow."

Merry Christmas!

~Behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. Luke 2:10-11~

Today is a new day. It's filled with new hopes and new joys. It's because today we celebrate the birth of a baby boy who has come to make all things new. Today, we say, "Merry Christmas," to everyone who passes us on the streets. But some, for fear of offending others, say, "Happy Holidays." Sometimes, I think we don't really understand why we say, "Merry Christmas."

Before Christ came, there was no Christmas; there were no presents. Back then, today was just another day among days. We say, "Merry Christmas" out of the joy that overflows on this anniversary--or birthday--celebration of the day when God came to His people on the earth. Today is the day that we can pinpoint the beginning of His life.

When you turn 27, your friends and family don't celebrate your life starting at 21. No, they celebrate your life from birth. On tombstones, a person's life is marked by two dates, birth and death. While Jesus was raised from the dead, His life is still marked by two dates: His birth and His Resurrection. We celebrate those two dates because they signify when our lives changed forever.

It's OK to celebrate holidays. There are plenty of fun ones to celebrate. Personally, I'm pretty keen on Flag Day. But today is Christmas. So as you say, "Merry Christmas," remember that we celebrate today because all those years ago a baby was born who would save the world. When you say, "Merry Christmas," you're not just wishing someone a "safe and happy holiday." You are passing on a wish to another of what Christ gave you: new life, new hope, and new joy.

Merry Christmas, everyone!

Make It

And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way, Colossians 1:10.

In the movie, Saving Private Ryan, there is a scene near the end of the movie where Tom Hanks' character--who was sent to find and bring home Private Ryan--has been hurt and he looks at Ryan and says, "Make it worth it." Tom Hanks' character made the ultimate sacrifice: he gave up his life so that another man could live his. That's what all military personnel do: they serve and they give their lives as a sacrifice so that others may live. All they ask in return is that you say thank you and live your life, full, the way it was meant to be lived.

Those men and women in all branches of the military model Jesus' example. Jesus came into the world, all those years ago from tonight. He came and He gave up his life so that others would have theirs. "The Son of Man came not to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many," (Matthew 20:28). Jesus was the ultimate sacrifice: He was completely without spot or blemish and He gave His life as the Sacrificial Lamb, so that our spots and blemishes would be removed and we would be made clean before the eyes of God.

There is a song we sing in church that talks about this very thing:
"And when before the throne, / I stand in Him complete, / Jesus died, my soul to save. / My lips shall still repeat. / Jesus paid it all, / All to Him I owe. / My sin had left a crimson stain, / He washed it white as snow."

Jesus left us debt-free and clean before the Throne and all He asks in return is for us to live a life worthy of what He did for us. Give others the ultimate Christmas present: introduce them to Jesus, if they have not already met. Give Jesus your ultimate present this Christmas: your life, lived worthily.

A Fitting

Wow, it's been two years ago and it seems like just yesterday I had to go down and get measured for my brother's wedding. I was so excited to be in his wedding, because I've always been one of his biggest fans, even if from a distance, and I thought he'd picked out the perfect girl to be his wife. I was glad to have her for a sister; and if you ever see her, we look like we could be sisters.

On the day of the fitting, my mom and and went to the dress shop. I was wearing comfortable clothes, because I figured they'd tell me what I needed to do. The girl took my measurements around my clothes, wrote down the numbers, and said I could go. I was quite upset at the numbers, for my hips were twice as large as my bust. It was quite distressing, so the lady took my measurements again, and pretty much came up with the same numbers. I sent the numbers to my brother's fiancee and she said it would be fine. That summer, I was delighted when they had to take in the dress. My brother and sister-in-law had a beautiful wedding and they are now living their happily ever after.

We were in church this past weekend and sang, "Away in a Manger." It's Christmas time and when singing these Christmas carols, I remember back to when I was little and we used to all sit at my grandparents' in their formal living room with the fire burning in the fireplace and my grandma playing the piano. We would all sing and my grandma would play and play. Before this past weekend, I never really thought about the lyrics of this song. They were just lyrics in a Christmas carol. This weekend, seeing the words on that screen was different for me, somehow.

The third verse sings, "Be near me Lord Jesus / I ask thee to stay / Close by me forever / And love me, I pray / Bless all the dear children / In Thy tender care / And fit us for heaven / To live with Thee there." It was the line, "And fit us for heaven," that struck me. The dictionary defines "fit" as, "to be adapted to or suitable for," "to be of the right size or shape for," "to put with precise placement or adjustment," "to equip." In this song, we are approaching God, the tailor or "dress maker," and asking Him to make us suitable for heaven; help shape our lives and hearts for that time and place; help us make proper adjustments and put us in the precise place; and equip us, give us the tools we will need to make it happen.

I think every child of God knows that heaven is in the future, but doesn't necessarily take that fact to heart. A lot of how we experience life is based upon our perspective. If you walk into a toy store from the perspective as the adult who has to pay, you will have a very different perspective from the child who gets to pick out the toys. In fact, even the adult who has to pay is having a different experience from the clerk who has to follow along after all the children and put the store back in order. Our perspective changes how we act and think about situations.

The same is true about heaven. If we can keep our eyes on the prize of heaven, our earthly issues become temporal, as the Bible calls them. The only reason Paul is able to call his problems, "light and momentary," is because he's looking at them through the perspective of eternal heaven, (see 2 Corinthians 4:17). If Paul's view and focus was only on earth and what went on around and to him everyday, then he probably not be noted as one who wrote a good majority of the New Testament. It's all about perspective. There is a song we sing in church. The lyrics are, "Turn your eyes upon Jesus / Look full in His wonderful face / And the things of earth will grow strangely dim / In the light of His glory and grace." That's exactly why Paul was able to call all his troubles "light and momentary." He chose the perspective of heaven, and stopped focusing entirely on his life on earth.

If we remember that Christ came as a baby and sacrificially lived and died so that our lives could be heaven-bound, then we will hold the right perspective. Think of the perspective of our Savior. He came and was born in a manger. He didn't live a flashy life; He wasn't keeping up with the Jones's. Then, when He died, that wasn't easy, either. Why was He able to do it? It's because He was "fit" for heaven. I hope your prayer this Christmas, and always, will be, "And fit us for heaven, to live with Thee there."

My Thorn

Has there ever been anything in your life that you would like to change, but have been unable? I know there are wrinkle creams and diet schemes and hair dyes every shade you can imagine. What I mean is something about you, like a health problem or the desire to change a feature about yourself. I know and fully believe that God is able to heal and change whatever He desires to change, but what if He chooses not to, what then?

There is a feature about myself that I tend to find quite annoying and that, unfortunately, I have let steal my peace over and over again. It's a simple, silly thing, really, and when you come right down to it, pales in comparison with what so many other people have to face. The Bible says that God never gives us more than we can handle, but often times gives us just a little bit to stretch us. If this were a pass/fail test, then I would have failed miserably a long time ago. Fortunately, I don't think God is pass/fail in this case. I think that He's allowing it to stretch me and teach me that it's not about me (possibly about my attitude, but not about me). This thing is silly (and I think you'll think I'm silly if I tell you what it is), but it's been my own little thorn, similar to what Paul was discussing in 2 Corinthians 12. He said, "Even though I have received wonderful revelations from God...I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger from Satan...," (vv 7). Paul never revealed, that I have seen, what his "thorn" was. He did say, "Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away," (vv 8). But God allowed it to be a learning tool for Paul, as He has allowed this thing to be a stretching tool for me. God said to Paul, "'My gracious favor is all you need. My power works best in your weakness,'" (vv 9).

So what is my thorn? It's an allergy. I am allergic to things scented that touch my skin: body washes, lotions, soaps. Now that you know, I hope you will not think less of me. I have allowed this thing, this allergy, to steal my peace and squash my joy. Before I started writing this, this morning, I was reading an e-mail from a friend who quoted Mother Teresa at the end of her e-mail. She said, "It's not how much you give, it's how much love you put into the giving." Too often, I've given myself a pity party because I could not use and enjoy a gift because of my allergy. What my attitude kept me from seeing was the love and thoughtfulness of the person giving the gift.

Lord, forgive me for my attitude and lack of appreciation. I know that these gifts have not been maliciously bought to frustrate me. They've been gifts of love and thoughtfulness and if I could just move my attitude out of the way, I would have seen that. Lord, forgive me for all the times I've let the devil steal my peace and my joy in this situation. Help me to have a better attitude and appreciation of the person. Lord, thank you for this revelation. Devil, just so you know, I'm gonna keep my peace and my joy, from now on. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Circle of Marriage

The wife is a reflection of how her husband treats her. The husband is the way that he treats his wife. If he treats his wife like a rose, then she will look like a rose and he will be a rose gardener. If he treats his wife like a doormat, then she will look trampled and he will be a bulldozer. If he treats his wife like a jewel and a precious gift from God and prays for her and is the spiritual leader of the home, then she will radiantly glow and will love exude from her with the qualities of Christ and he will stand as he was meant to stand before the Lord.

~Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless, (Ephesians 5:25-27). ~

Giants Fear

Why do we fear what we do not know or understand? Why is our first response to retreat in fear instead of standing our ground in Christ? When God works in you and through you, others pay attention and take notice. Realize that your "power" and strength come not from you, but from God who is infinitely powerful.

Consider the Israelites. When they approached Canaan, they were afraid of the giants they saw, (see Numbers 13:26-33). But what they didn't know was that those "giants" who lived in the land had heard about what God had done for and through His people and the giants were afraid of God's people (see Joshua 2:9-11). However, because the Israelites allowed fear to grip and overpower them, the Israelites were forced to leave the land and not enter for 40 years. By then, the giants had forgotten all they stories they had heard about the Israelites.

What in this world looks giant to you? What looks too massive for God to overcome? What's got you tossing and turning at night, instead of resting peacefully? Remember, at the name of Jesus, every knee on the earth, above the earth, and under the earth will bow, and every demon trembles at the sight of Jesus, (see Philippians 2:10, James 2:19, Mark 5:7). Perhaps it is time you showed your giant just how powerful your God is. Perhaps it is time you walked in and took over your Promise Land.

~Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power...so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand, (Ephesians 6:10,13). ~

Refreshing

I'm getting ready to go on vacation next week. I have three more days of work, followed by a week off, then two days of work, followed by a three-day weekend. Everyone at work keeps asking me, "What are you doing with your time off? Are you traveling? Are you going to keep busy?" We'll be with family and hang out with friends. But honestly, I'm looking forward to a couple of days just relaxing. God promised us times of refreshing (see Acts 3:19), but sometimes I think we miss our opportunity. Oh, I know there is plenty to do, trips to take, people to see. I know we like to do all that and there is nothing wrong with doing all of that, but during the hustle and bustle of your time off, don't forget to take some "down time."

In Genesis, the Bible tells us that on the seventh day, God rested (vv 2:2). I don't think He did that because He was winded, nor do I think He did it because He was stressed and overworked and needed a vacation. I think He did it to be a model to us. We need someone to be a model of good habits, or we won't make them part of our routines. Today's devotion talked about taking a "time out." It said the reason we don't is because we're too busy. "If you want to have the greatest impact when you do work, learn to take 'time out,'" (Friday, Dec. 18, 2009). I've heard teachers and others say that the mind can only taken in so much information before it shuts off. I had a psychology professor in college once say that we weren't supposed to do a "brain flush" after every test. In life, you don't need to do a "brain flush" to feel relaxed. All you need to do is follow what God prescribed in His Word for you: lie down in green pastures and rest beside quite waters so that you may be comforted, refreshed, and restored (see Psalm 23). Have a merry, rested Christmas. Enjoy your time with family, friends, and Jesus.

Are You a "cracked pot" or a "crack pot"?

A "crack pot" is typically someone described as being "not all there." A "cracked pot" is something made by the hands of God. The Bible says, "The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the glory of the gospel of Christ, who is the image of God," (2 Corinthians 4:4). I was listening to the radio yesterday morning and I heard a woman giving an interview. She said something that sounds awful, but I've heard many others who have similar pasts say the same thing, "I thought the abuse was normal. I didn't know anything else." As sad as that is, it's a very common thought among child abuse victims. This verse says God "has blinded the minds of the unbelievers so that they cannot see the light." You are not aware of the darkness all around you, unless or until you have something to compare it against. Child abuse victims are not aware that life could or should be any different until someone comes alongside them and, through a lot of love and patience, begins to peel away the scabs that have been their lives up till that point.

The same is true for unbelievers. God has put a shield or cover over them so they cannot see the light, until it is revealed to them. But God has a plan for that, too. In the beginning, there was God and then God spoke and His Word became life. With His Word He said, "Let light shine out of darkness," (2 Corinthians 4:6). In the beginning there was not light and there was not darkness, there was only God. But God has a plan for His people, so after blinding the unbeliever, He placed inside the believers His light. He put it inside their broken lives so that His light would shine through the places where their lives were not perfect.

God says, "you are no longer a 'crack pot,' lost in your broken life. For you have stepped out of the darkness and I have placed inside of you My light, for all the world to see. You will no longer be a 'crack pot' in the world. From now on, you will be My cracked pot, so that the world may see My glory shining through you."

Love by God

"Today I want to tell you that I love you," God said as He stroked my hair and kissed my forehead.

What does it mean to be loved by God?

I will never leave you nor forsake you (Joshua 1:5)--means never, ever being abandoned, but always in His care.

I have loved you with an everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:3)--means you will never be unlovable, for He has always loved you.

I have engraved you in the palms of my hands (Isaiah 49:16)--means He loves you so much and is so proud of you (a proud papa) that He carries your picture around with Him always, so He can always look on you with love and adoration.

I have chosen you (1 Thessalonians 1:4) and I have called you by name; you are mine (Isaiah 43:1)--means not only are you not a mistake, you were chosen by God specifically so He could love you and raise you up to be something unique and special--His.

What does it mean to be loved by God? It means never lacking anything--not love, a home, parents, friends, food, not anything. If God takes care of the daisies of the field, how much more so will He take care of His Heather, too?

Questions

*Why is it easier to hear God in the noise than in the quiet?
*Why is it easier to recall a whole bunch of songs and lyrics and movie lines, but sitting in the quiet without any noise--internal or external--it quite difficult?

Do you believe you'll hear from God? Do you believe in the quiet you'll hear His voice? If the answer is "no," then this exercise is futile. But if you believe, then you will hear.

The proof is in the pudding, or so they say. But what more proof do I need? Today is a new day and I have breath in my lungs, why must God send me any more proof, as if He were a magician at my beck-and-call? If I have heard God in the daylight, He will surely not leave me in the night. If I have heard God through the noise and the craziness that is my life, then I must believe (have faith) that I will hear from Him in my quiet times, too.

Thank you, God, for sending me this message, this reminder, that I must believe and walk (or listen) by faith, or my request is in vain.

Be Quiet

(In response to "Found Listening"...)

This morning as I was practicing "listening," I remembered back to the first time I heard God's voice and remember the anxiety in me as I desperately called out and asked God to let me hear from Him. We were at a Christian retreat with another church and they had us walking through this maze (not a cornfield maze...it's hard to explain). Over and over I kept repeating in my heart, "Lord, let me hear from you. I want to hear your voice." Over and over, I kept repeating it. Finally, I heard God say, "Be quiet." He said that I had to stop talking in order to hear Him. I think it's amazing that God will use the words that you need in order for you to understand what He wants to communicate, so that He can reach you and meet you, right where you're at.

At the time that I heard from God, I didn't know, or at least didn't understand, the scripture, "Be still and know that I am God," (Psalm 46:10). It would have communicated a different message to me at the time, simply because I didn't understand its meaning. So, in His infinite wisdom, God spoke something I would understand. Because of that, I was able to feel confident that I had heard from God and was pretty certain that I would hear from God in the future.

Yesterday, in my listening time, I heard God whisper something I did know. And, I know that the next time I hear from God, He will tell me something that I can understand, even if its true meaning is something to be searched out. "It is the glory of God to conceal a thing; but the honor of kings to search out a matter," (Proverbs 25:2). As a daughter of the King, it is my honor to seek a thing that God tells me to seek, and to uncover a matter which God tells me to explore. But all of it begins with my sitting and waiting and listening to hear what He has to say. That is why, when He comes to speak to me, I pray that I will be found listening.

Found Listening

He who has ears to hear, let him hear! ~ Matthew 13:9

I never really thought about why I have two ears before. My parents have two ears, my husband has two ears, even my dog has two ears; it just seems normal to me. When I was a child, I learned about the 5 senses and how my ears were for hearing. And since then, I basically only thought of hearing in terms of what sounds entered my ears. However, as I've grown in my relationship with Christ, and then just this morning, when I was reading about the secret place of God and prayer, I started to think about the other place I hear...with my spiritual ears. I've been reading a book that was given to me by a friend called, Secrets of the Secret Place, by Bob Sorge. After reading the table of contents, I thought I'd probably skip ahead to chapter 20, because the first several chapters were in a section called, "Accepting the Great Invitation." When I read that, I foolishly thought to myself, "I've been a Christian for years. I understand about the invitation." But then I started reading, from the beginning, and saw that I didn't know it all and I didn't walk it all, and the hardest to face: I wasn't hearing it all. I'm in chapter three and have discovered that the "invitation" is not about accepting Jesus, as I thought it would be, but it's about prayer and mostly it's about hearing from God.

I hear from God quite often. He talks to me in my car, during the day, and when I'm about to write my blogs. But what have I been missing by not having "listening time" during prayer? We pray before dinner and pray before bed, but those are all speaking times. I've rarely had listening times. And I know why. It's because I simply haven't done it. I could tell you that it's because I live in a fast-paced Martha world, but that's just another excuse. I am a child of God by His choice. I am a Christ follower by my choice. If I am truly going to sit at the feet of Jesus, I need to do a lot more listening.

Secrets of the Secret Place talks about the where, how, why, and what of the secret place. The "where" and "how" are, "When you enter your room, and shut your door, you are in the presence of your Father. Instantaneously!" (8). The key, as the author points out, is to shut the door. The Bible says that prayer should be in the privacy of your secret place and should take place between you and the Father, (see Matthew 6:6). The "why" of the secret place is to "build foundations into your life that will survive the harshest storms of life," (9). In John 16:33 (my favorite verse), Jesus promised us that we would face storms in this world, but we should be confident in Him, because He has already overcome the world (and death).

My role or the "what" in the secret place is "to listen for anything God might want to speak," with the understanding that "I can't tell God what to speak, or when to speak it. But I can position myself in the secret place so that, when He chooses to speak, I am found listening," (12). That last sentence reminds me of Luke 12, when Jesus is talking about watchfulness: "'Be dressed and ready for service...like men waiting for their master to return...so that when he comes and knocks they can immediately open the door for him. It will be good for those servants whose master finds them watching when he comes,'" (vv 35-37). It will be better for me if, when God is ready to speak, I am found listening. Though God has, can, and may speak so that my physical ears can hear, He, most often speaks so that my heart or my spiritual ears hear. God is heard in many ways. Sometimes He is heard in a thundercloud (see Psalm 81:7), and sometimes His voice is no more audible than a whisper (see 1 Kings 19:12). Hearing the thundercloud is easy. Hearing the whisper takes training and preparation.

Throughout the gospels, Jesus often talks about Himself as a Shepherd who speaks sweetly and gently to His sheep. He has said, "My sheep listen to my voice...and they follow me," (John 10:27). If my desire is to know and follow the Will of God, then I must listen for the voice of God. I need to be found listening when my Jesus comes to speak to me.

SHOW and tell

You show that you are a letter from Christ...written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts. 2 Corinthians 3:3

Did you ever participate in "show-and-tell" when you were a child? For show-and-tell, each child must bring in something to the classroom and tell the other students about it. I think show-and-tell is the way God wants us to be. He wants us to show the world, through our actions and by our love, who He is. He wants us to reflect Him so much so that others can not help but ask, "What makes you different? How can I have some of that?" Then, He wants us to tell them about the peace, joy, and love that we experience through a relationship with Him.

As people watch you--and if they know you are a Christian, they will watch you--they should begin to see Jesus in you. "And we...all reflect the Lord's glory," (2 Corinthians 3:18). Others should be able to God's glory in you and should be able to see the letter from Christ that's written on your heart. As you spend more time with God, others will see more of Jesus through you. It's from what they see in you that will either repel them from or draw them to Jesus. Ask yourself, do people see Jesus in me? What am I reflecting today? Christ wrote a love letter on your heart; share it with the world.

~Preach the gospel at all times. Use words if necessary. St. Francis of Assisi ~

Time at The Feet

When is phenomenal not enough? I hit a brick wall last night and it surprised me, because I never even saw it coming. We've been counseling a couple who come claim they want to save their marriage, but after this week's session, I was heart broken for them. My husband reminded me that it's not my job to save their marriage; it's the job of the Holy Spirit, and even then, they have to decide that they want it badly enough.

Counseling was not the only area where I hit the wall. The office where I work is undergoing major transition and the last couple of days, I haven't even been able to lie to myself. Now, I know that sounds horrible that I would lie to myself, but it's not quite like that. It's kind of like self-talk: If you tell yourself enough times that you are stupid and will fail, then eventually, you'll believe it and it will become a self-fulfilling prophesy. Well, when people would ask, I would tell them that I was phenomenal and for the most part, I believed it. It was actually only this morning when I was lying in bed thinking about it that I realized that it had very little to do with the words I was saying and a lot more to do with my discipline.

Not too long ago, I was very disciplined in taking three breaks every day at work: one the morning, one at lunch, and one in the afternoon. Somewhere along the way, I believed the lie that I was too busy to take a break. The real truth is, I'm too busy to not take my breaks. You see, during my breaks, I was spending quiet time with God.

Doctors recommend that we eat 6-8 small meals per day to keep our metabolism functioning at the optimum level. It is also recommended that to keep our "spirit man" functioning at the optimum level, we feed him throughout the day. I was reading in the book, Standing Firm, by Donna Partow, that she was trying to lose weight and so joined a weight lifting class. She said that finally her instructor told her she was getting nowhere because she wasn't eating properly or enough throughout the day, (62-63). Our spirit man needs the same kind of diet. "Have you been playing a little game with the Christian life, seeing how long you can go without spiritual food? You'll never make serious progress like that. You need to eat first thing in the morning and continue feeding your spirit throughout the day," (Partow 63). The author recommends several different options. I've found that what has worked best for me is to listen to Christian radio, or CD's while I'm working and then reading the Bible or other books that feed me Godly wisdom during my breaks. Unfortunately, because I had gotten away from constantly feeding my spirit man, he was having to work harder on less fuel and was becoming dehydrated and malnourished.

I have new resolve this morning. No matter how important I think a project is, it is more important to stop, step away, and hang out with the J-man. Someone once said, "We need to be Mary in a Martha world." For a while, I had that down. I was hanging out with Mary at the feet of Jesus. It's cold in this fast-paced Martha world. I hope that the next time you see me, you'll find me where I belong: sitting with Mary at the feet of my Jesus.

Trust

Trust is a very fragile asset. I say asset because it's something that is of value in and of itself and it adds value to everything. Trust comes easily to some and harder to others. However, trust, once broken takes a long time and a lot of hard work to "restore and repair." Honestly, I don't think you can really "restore or repair" original trust. I think once original trust is broken, you must work diligently and persevere to build new trust. It may never be the same as original trust, but it may be better. New trust has an understanding that says, "We stuck it out. We were int he pit together and now we are on the mountain top. We are more cemented than before."

Have you ever watched a young child with his or her parent or caretaker? That child has complete trust and dependence upon the person taking care of him. Once that child becomes a little older, he will have to choose to trust someone, even his parents. Paul talks about the trust that he has in God. "[God] has delivered us...and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us," (2 Corinthians 1:10). Paul is talking about trust through faith and hope. He knows he can trust God because God has delivered him and because God always does as He promises, Paul is reassured that God will deliver him in the future. Paul is so certain about it, that like a young child to his parent, Paul is putting all his trust (hope) in the Lord, that He will continue to deliver Paul.

God calls to all of us to be as little children in our relationship with Him. As a young child is solely dependant upon his parents, God wants us to be solely dependant upon Him. He calls to us, "Son, Daughter, I have loved you with an everlasting love. Be as babes and come and set your hope on me. There are many things that will break your trust in the fallen world, but I am the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. come and live in relationship with me and I will teach you about real hope, real love, and real trust." All you have to do is receive His gift that He offers to you so freely. The choice is yours.

Willing

A lot of the Christmas songs I've been hearing lately are from Mary and Joseph's point of view or are about their experience as parents to the living King. Often, I have wondered if Mary or Joseph, had they known in advance that their baby would have to endure the cross, would have gone through with the birth and raising of Jesus? It was told to them that He would be the Savior, but could they really comprehend what that means?

"Do not be afraid Mary, you have found favor with God. You will be with child and give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus. He will be great and will be called the son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever; his kingdom will never end," (Luke 1:30-33). Can you imagine being the young girl, Mary, approached by an angel from heaven who said, "Do not be afraid. God has hand-picked you to deliver the Deliverer"? God's people had been waiting a long time for the Deliverer to come and deliver them. Mary, growing up in a Jewish family, would have known that. How would that have rocked your whole world had the angel come to you? The fear, the anxiety, how would you have responded? Mary said, "I am the Lord's servant, and I am willing to accept whatever..." (Luke 1:38). And what about Joseph? At the time she first became pregnant, she and Joseph were not even married (see Matthew 1:18). What was he going to do?

Joseph was going to divorce her "behind closed doors" so as not shame Mary or himself. But, because God knew this, He sent an angel to say to him, "Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins," (Matthew 1:20-21). As a man of God, but still just a man of trade, the anxiety he must have felt, and possibly the fear or uncertainty. How did he respond? The Bible says, "he did what the angel of the Lord commanded him and took Mary home as his wife," (Matthew 1:24).

So a teenage mother and her husband, a carpenter, set out on a journey that would change everything. They had been told they would be raising a Savior, a King, but how did they really process that? I wonder if Mary looked back on those days during Jesus' long walk to the place called the Skull and asked God why. "Why did You bother to bring Him into this world only to send Him out in such a horrifying way? Why did you tell me His kingdom would have no end if He's dying on the cross today? Why, God, why?" I wonder if Mary and Joseph, had known from the beginning that their baby Jesus would have to endure crucifixion, would have answered God differently? Would they have said, "Lord, pass this cup to someone else. I don't understand your ways."

If hindsight is 20/20, as they say, what is foresight? I think that's why God didn't reveal His whole plan to them, or to us. If we only knew how much pain we'd have to endure for His plan, would we even begin? Probably not. Fortunately, it's Christmastime because one young teenage daughter and a simple carpenter both said, "I am the Lord's servant and I am willing to accept whatever the Lord asks."

Look to The Source, Not the source

Isn't it amazing that we say, "God will provide for____ (fill in the blank)," but we don't wait for God? Some say, "God has called me for this," or "God has called me for that," or "God has called me to do it this way..." Great! Awesome! Wonderful! You are supposed to follow that, why do you walk to humans with your hand out? We've all done it. We say God will get us through this (hint, hint, nudge, nudge). If God's gonna do it, why do we look to humans? I think it's because we know that God uses humans. So we think of the most likely sources (in our minds) and we wait expectantly on them, instead of waiting expectantly on God.

Let me give you an example from my life. My husband and I were flat broke, and so far from making rent, as well as the other bills, it was unbelievable. So we asked for money and the money was given, with the understanding that we would pay these people back x # of dollars over a certain period of time. Well, that was all well and good, until they said, "We'll bless you and you don't have to pay it back." Now, going into that time, my husband & I had become a lot closer to God than we ever had before--granted, we had such a long journey ahead of us, and still do--so we, before asking for help, said, "God will provide," but then asked the church for help. So, a couple months later (not sure exactly how long of a gap), we were in the same boat and so we went back to the source. Notice I used a small "s". That's because we didn't call upon God. We may have said, "God will provide," but, we didn't wait for God. Instead, we went back to the people who had helped us before.

So, the people who had helped us before, along with some other people from the church, sat us down and gave us the best blessing ever: They said no. There is a saying, "Give a man a fish and feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and feed him for life." That's what they did for us. They said that they could keep continuing to do this, or they could give us the tools and we could learn to do it ourselves...and really lean on God. That day, they sat us down and gave me some instruction and gave Brad some instruction, and talked about some things that seemed crazy to us--all of which we have implemented, save one thing. Because of the other things that they instructed us in (and if you ever ask me one-on-one, I'll tell you), God has so blessed us by doing them, that we've never had to each work two to three jobs, to where we were just like ships, passing in the night, even for a season. Now, granted, we're still working through our debt and they are debt free...but we're OK with that, because diligently, we're paying off our debt, too.

Saying, "no" isn't the worst thing you can ever tell somebody. Sometimes (and it won't feel like it in the midst of it), it's the biggest blessing that you can ever give to somebody. Saying "no" and standing by what you say, is just setting a boundary in your life and theirs, if they choose to remain in relationship with you. Dr's. Henry Cloud and John Townsend have written a whole series on Boundaries. They have broken the larger subject into smaller, more detailed books. There's one for marriages, for kids, for work, etc. They say that a boundary is nothing more than a property line that shows where one thing ends and another thing begins, (Boundaries in Marriage, 17). Telling someone you love, "no" doesn't mean "I hate you." Rather, it tells them, "This is where my responsibility ends and your responsibility begins." Teaching someone that is really, really the greatest, but hardest gift. I had a wonderful girlfriend listen to me talk about my relationship--and all the struggles--with my family. One day she looked at me and told me that I needed to read this revolutionary book called Boundaries. And I did. And it was a challenge, a painful challenge at times, but so worth it on the other side. I honestly recommend it to everyone.

My hope for you today, is that if you feel compelled to say "no" to something, that you will explain to the other person why (calmly and respectfully), and then keep saying "no" at that same boundary line, so that both of you will learn and respect that your no means no. I pray that God will guide you into all things and all truths and if there's an area where He has called you, remember that He will provide, because He said He would.

Remain, For Life

I've been listening and watching and seeing a lot of pain in the church as of late. Now, "the church" is not the building that houses my friends and I. The Church is the body of believers who call themselves followers of Christ. Some of my friends tell me that some of their friends were yelled at and such at one church, so instead of working it out, they left the church to find life elsewhere. A couple of husband & wife friends said that they just couldn't seem to work it out, so the husbands left, to also find life elsewhere. That seems to be a common theme: grass greener on the other side, so people are leaving to find life elsewhere.

Do you know what quiting and leaving does? The only thing that leaving under these circumstances does is make you restart the lesson elsewhere. Kind of like the Israelites. The didn't learn the lesson the first time, so God made them wander in the desert for 40 years until they learned. In her book, Battlefield of the Mind, Joyce Meyer talks about this, but said that the Israelites had to stay in the desert until finally, God said, "' You have dwelt long enough on this mountain. Turn and take up your journey and go to the hill country of the Amorites...Behold, I have set the land before you; go in and take possession of the land...' Deuteronomy 1:6-8," (34). The Israelites were forced to wander for 40 years on a journey that would have only taken them 11 days if they had not given up.

Last night, we had a praise and worship service at our church and our pastor talked briefly about oranges. He said that fruit, like oranges, become the sweetest during the harshest conditions because the tree sends all the nutrients to the fruit at once, so as to protect the fruit during such harsh conditions. Jesus talks about this in John 15:1-6. He said that He is the vine and we are the branches and we will bear much fruit if we remain in Him and if He remains in us. However, if we do not remain in Him, we will wither and be thrown away. That may sound harsh, but if we want the promise of bearing sweet fruit, then we must remain in Him and journey through the harsh conditions, whether that be facing a swarm of giants, like the Israelites or committing to seeing your marriage through, like our friends.

Our pastor often says that the Bible is full of God's promises, but every promise comes with a premise, an "if-then" statement. Galatians 6:9, "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." "Like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear," (1 Peter 3:6). There are many reasons to give up and there are more than enough things to be afraid of in this world. Jesus told us we would have these problems, but He, too, gave us a promise: "In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world," (John 16:33). If you can remember that God has overcome and that you are in God through His Son, Jesus Christ, then there is no reason to "seek life elsewhere," for there is no life apart from the Vine who nourishes you. So, remain in Him and He will remain in you.

God's Open Doors

Is this your marriage: You have a reputation of being alive, but you are dead, (Revelation 3:1)? If so, do as the Bible commands: Wake up! Strengthen what remains and what is about to die, (v2, bold mine). You don't have to give up just because times are tough! The whole world may be "sending you signs" to give up, you may even drive past "Divorce ASAP" every day, but God sent His own sign: Jesus Christ, our Lord.

God doesn't do anything without reason; He does everything with a purpose. He sent His Son as a way to connect with us on our human level. He wanted to make a way that when we cry out to Him, He could say, "I know, I've been there." A husband cries out and says, "She's given up on me!" God says, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you," (Hebrews 13:5). A wife cries out, "He doesn't love me anymore...and I don't know if I love him." God says, "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness," (Jeremiah 31:3). A couple cries out, "We don't have strength left to fight for this anymore." God says, "Do not fear, for I am with you...I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you in my righteous right hand," (Isaiah 41:10).

God, Himself, has drawn us to Him using His love for us. Now we, in turn, know how to love one another with that same love. Anytime we feel we are drained, we can turn back to the One who showed us perfect love first. Do not say, "My marriage is doomed to fail," for God said, "I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut," (Revelations 3:8). The Bible tells us, "What [God] opens no one can shut, and what he shuts no one can open," (vv 3:7). If God had not wanted you to get married, He would not have opened that door. However, the end or continuation of your marriage is in your hands, because God also granted you free will. Cry out to God today! Ask Him to fill you with love for and a desire to fight for your spouse. Now, "Wake Up" this marriage, for it is not yet dead.

Secret Things

We speak of God's secret wisdom, a wisdom that has been hidden and that God destined for our glory before time began. ~ 1 Corinthians 2:7

About a year and a half ago, I picked up a book that challenged me to read the Bible cover to cover in a year. So, now it's been a year and about 4 months and I've made it to 1 Corinthians, but I'm OK with that. The Women's Ministry Leader in our church once said that she tried to read the Bible in a year, but God allowed her to understand that it was for His glory and His predestined reason that she would not reach her goal, but that it would take her longer. He wanted her to really study certain scriptures and not just read them and move on to make her goal. I'm not sure if that's God's reasoning for why it's taken me so long, but nevertheless, here I am reading about the secret things of God and there is an area in my life where I need His light to shine.

I believe that God has a plan and a purpose for me. I also believe that He's revealed bits and pieces of His plan to me. However, I'm a firm believer that God doesn't reveal everything to us before we even begin the journey, or even while we are in the midst of it. I think He does that--keeps certain things hidden--for two reasons: 1) He wants us to act on faith without having the answers and 2) If we know what might happen to us or what we will have to endure, we might not follow where God wants to lead us.

The Bible tells us "faith without works is dead," (James 2:20). It is not enough to believe God, for "even the demons believe--and tremble!" (James 2:19). You must put your money where your mouth is, so-to-speak. If you are out of work, simply sitting on your couch, believing that God will provide for you is not the same as believing that He will open the right door for you as you actively go out and look for work. There must be some kind of action behind our words or our beliefs or what credit is it to God? If you have been saved and set free by God and yet you continue to act in all the same ways as you did before, then who will ever know what God did for you and how is that faith? The Bible says, "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed..." (Romans 12:2). We must be "do-ers" of God's Word and not believers-only.

Now, while we are walking by faith, I believe that God will reveal the next step that we need to take, but may not reveal the next five steps. Or, He may reveal step 10, just to encourage us to keep going, but He won't reveal steps 2-9. I really think God does this to both encourage us, but also to protect us. Our human minds are fragile and if we know that we might encounter pain beforehand, we may never take the next step, even if we know that in the end, it will all be worth it. It's like grandparents, before a young couple is about to be married, telling of their hardships. The elder couple can describe it, but the young couple will have to endure their own hardships to truly appreciate, in the end, what a wonderful marriage they have. Third Day's song, "Mountain of God," says, "After all that I've been through / Now I realize the truth / That I must go through the valley / To stand upon the mountain of God," (Wherever You Are, 2005). It says after. it's only after we've endured the pain, can we appreciate the reason and the blessing. It's hard to appreciate it beforehand and it's especially hard to appreciate it during. But after we've gone through, how much sweeter is step 10 than step 1?

At the beginning of this blog, I said that there was an area of my life that I needed revealed to me. It's an area that I'm really unsure about and I need God to shine His light on it to reveal to me if this is in His Will for my life. I'm going to pray for me; I hope you will pray for you.

Lord, I don't know what I desire, or if I even desire it. But the one thing I do is desire Your will and Your way for my life. Show me what that is. Reveal to me that part of it. Lord, you have a secret wisdom. Let there be light on this area, that I may know your desires for my life, and act in faith, accordingly. Lord, you know this whole topic--this area--scares me, but I also know that if I don't ask you, then I may be missing out on my "step 10" and I don't want to stop at "step 3" because I was afraid of something I couldn't see. Please reveal to me your desire, so that I know which way to turn. In Jesus' Name I pray, Amen.

Channels Through the Sun-Scorched Land

The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail. your people will rebuild the ancient ruins and will raise up the age-old foundations; you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls, Restorer of Streets with Dwellings ~ Isaiah 58:11-12

"A conduit is a channel through which things...move from one point to another...You are designed to be a free-flowing channel for Jesus Christ Himself," (The Word for You Today, 26, Nov. 2009).

Who's been a conduit for you? I'm sure this question instantly brings to mind a handful of specific people for different reasons. It's the same for me. Some were a part of my life for a season, only, and others are still a part of my daily life. The scripture above talks about a "sun-scorched land." All of the people who were conduits in my life were in my life while I was going through my own sun-scorched land. Some of those times were longer than others and some times were more difficult than others. The one thing that all of the conduits in my life have in common is that they all stuck through the sun-scorched times and helped to develop within me my own "well-watered garden."

I have already, in previous posts talked about my period of depression. I had one such friend who I would call constantly because I was so lost, I couldn't feel God's love for me anymore. She became that free-flowing channel for me. She had scriptures taped up on the cupboards at her house. She would pull down different ones for me and I would tape them up on our bathroom mirror. At the end of those months, when I was finally free from that deadly pit, she was the one I looked to, but she wouldn't let me stop there. She always turned me toward Jesus and said that it was Him all along. Donna Partow, in her book Standing Firm, talks about the example that my friend was to me: "God will strengthen you and make you like a well-watered garden...you'll be an agent of security and peace, a haven of rest for the weary...people will come to you in their time of crisis. You, in turn can point them to the only One who can guide them through the sun-scorched land," (31). That's what my friend did. Every time I would call or run to her, she would lead me back to God's Word and to His promises. And it was God's Word and His promises that I stood on to get me through, but I also needed her...to point me in the right direction. If she hadn't shown me the way, I don't know if I ever would have made it out.

If there are people in you life who have been "conduits" and "change-agents" for you, make sure to tell them. They'll probably still point you back to God, because it is from Him where their strength flows, but they still need to be appreciated, just the same.

Convictions

One man's faith allows him to eat everything, but another man, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables. ~ Romans 14:2

Ever since the time I was little, we would always sneak snacks into the movie theatres, even though all of them said you weren't supposed to. My mom or my grandma would empty out their purses just enough that we could sneak in candy bars. I think as I got older, my friends and I got more daring and would sneak in soda. Although, soda got really hard, because those around you could hear you when you opened it--the cans, especially, but the bottles, too.

At any rate, I think it was two summers ago when the movie Fireproof hit the theatres and we invited a couple from our small group to go to the movies with us. When we were getting ready to go to the movies, I don't remember if it was me or my husband or both at the same time, but we agreed not to take snacks to the movies. It felt "wrong" to do so. I wasn't sure why, all of a sudden, it felt "wrong" to sneak snacks in, especially after becoming so "good" at it. So I did what I always did when I had a "spiritual" question, I called my friend.

My friend had been a stronger, longer leader than me, so I always felt good about asking her opinion on things. So, I called her up and explained the situation and asked if it was wrong and had it been "wrong" all those years before. She told me that what I was experiencing was "conviction". She said that the Holy Spirit was using this experience to let me know not to do that at this particular time. She couldn't tell me whether or not I would ever again feel not guilty about sneaking food into the theatres. She made it clear, though, that if the Holy Spirit was convicting me to not do it at this time, I shouldn't do it.

She also said that the conviction may not even be for me. She said it was possible that I was feeling convicted to not do it and by not doing so would benefit the other couple. She said it was possible, for example, that if the other couple saw us smuggle in snacks, it would distract them and what ever message they were supposed to get from the movie would be lost because they'd been thinking about our actions of sneaking in snacks the entire time.

Paul talks about this very thing in Romans 14. He says, "Nothing is unclean in itself. But if anyone regards something as unclean, then for him it is unclean," (14). This would be the conviction part. If the Holy Spirit tells you not to do something, it becomes "unclean," (defiled or unholy; continuing to do this action becomes an act of disobedience). Paul also says, "If your brother is distressed because of what you eat, you are no longer acting in love. Do not by your eating destroy your brother for whom Christ died," (Romans 14:15). This is the part that my friend was talking about. She said that it was possible that my actions would so distress my friends, that it would distract them from whatever God was trying to do in their lives.

I didn't know this passage of scripture at the time that this happened two summers ago. It's possible I'd heard it talked about in a sermon and hi-lighted the passage, but I didn't know it to the point where when my friend was talking about this very thing I would have recognized her thoughts as being from the Bible. I just believed she had wisdom and knew she hadn't steered me wrong before and that's why I went to her for advice. I'm always amazed by the people and things that God will use to teach us about His truths.

that day

On my part, I would like to have warm, positive feelings toward him again, (Chapman, Gary, The Five Love Languages, 166).

I still remember the day I prayed that prayer. It was in October, on a Sunday, 2006. Our church was holding baptisms out at Coquina Beach. We were told that we could ask the Holy Spirit for anything we wanted and He would fill up that void in our lives. I knew instantly what I wanted. I hadn't been able to achieve it on my own.

I walked down the sandy shore and out among the waves to the pastor who would baptize me. He talked to me briefly about the baptism I was about to receive. Then he asked me the all important question: "If you could ask the Holy Spirit for just one thing, what would it be?" I knew right away and I cried when I said, "I want to love my husband again. I want to respect him and have a marriage that lasts." My pastor prayed for and with me and then he baptized me in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.

When I came up out of the water, I knew that I was different...that my life would never be the same...all because of that day when I prayed.

On the Road to Damascus

Have you ever been caught off guard? You were living your life, the way you saw fit, but then something happened and the Lord revealed to you that you weren't going the way He intended? I think that's exactly what happened to Paul.


In Acts 9, we see the story of Paul (previously known as Saul) unfold. Saul had obtained written permission to go to Damascus and seize as prisoner anyone who was part of "the Way". "As he neared Damascus on his journey, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him," (Acts 9:1-3). While we'll soon learn that the flash from heaven was God, I like to think of the flash as Paul's "light bulb moment." I'm sure you've had at least one and seen them in cartoons; it's that point where "the light" goes off in your brain and you have an "ah-ha" moment. It's usually at that point that cartoon characters will reach up and click off the light bulb that's floating just above their heads. This was Paul's light bulb moment and in his moment, God revealed to Paul "the vision from heaven" of what he was appointed to do, (Acts 26:19). Paul's light bulb moment was all about receiving a vision from heaven.


I believe that God has a light bulb moment and visions from heaven for each of us. If it were not true, God would not have talked about it in His Word. "Where there is no revelation, the people cast off restraint," (Proverbs 29:18). That's what a lot of people seem to do. They are on their own "road to Damascus," going for their own reasons: to live big, live it up, make a lot of money, take great vacations, and retire some place comfortable. What if God wanted your life to be more than a fast food commercial, in which the theme song for your life was, "I did it my way"? What if He wanted it to be greater and worth more? He's able to do it. Ephesians 3:20 says, "To him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we can ask or imagine," (emphasis mine). This verse says we won't even be able to measure how much greater it will be if we turn it over and follow His plan.


So, where do we begin? We begin where Paul began: on the road to Damascus. The place where you start is right where you are today. God doesn't want to change who you are, He wants to change your heart. He wants you to leave your fleshy desires behind, pick up the vision He has prepared for you, and follow Him.


What's the first step? Dare to dream. Again, Proverbs 29:18 said, "Where there is no revelation, the people cast off restraint." If you're going to plan to go somewhere, you have to have an idea about what it will look like when you've "arrived." That's what an architect does before he picks up the first piece of wood or has someone move the first handful of dirt. He lays out his blueprint. "You are the architect and building contractor of your future. Use your thoughts as an architect uses a blueprint. Think about every detail. An architect not only thinks about all the rooms in a house but also the types of windows, the size of the closets, the location of the outlets, and so on. Nothing is too insignificant. Think big and think detailed," (Trimm, Cindy, Commanding Your Morning, 29)!


I'm scared to think about my dreams; what if they're not God's dreams for my life? That's what I said to one of my best friends a couple of years ago. She encouraged me, through my tears, to confess my dreams to God and to leave them in His hands. She said that if my dreams weren't His dreams, He'd change the desires of my heart to match His, if I'd only let Him. It's gut-wrenching and scary to let go of your dreams. When it's what you've held onto for forever, it's hard to imagine that you could want anything else, or even that the "something else" could be even better than you've ever dreamed.

How could I even dare to think that what I imagine will actually come true? God did it. I once heard Dennis Rainy say, "the Bible is a blueprint for life," (Understanding and Honoring Your Wife, FamilyLife Today). He's right. If God did not want us to do it, or model what He did, I don't think He would have included it in His Word. If Dennis is right and the Bible is a blueprint for our lives, then we should follow the examples of what God did and is doing. For example, we should follow God's lead as it says in Romans 4:17, "God who gives life to the dead and calls things that are not as though they were." That's what having a vision in your mind before having an example in your life is all about it. As one pastor at my church said, "Dance in advance, baby. Dance in advance." You've got to believe you have received it and walk it out. If that's what God does, I don't see any reason why we shouldn't.

After I've got it in my head, then what? Write it down and run with it! "Write down the revelation and make it plain on tablets so that a herald [or so that whoever reads it] may run with it," (Habakkuk 2:2). Take your vision, take your dream, and run with it. Don't ever look back to see what somebody else is doing or to wonder why the rest of the world isn't keeping pace with you. Just keep running ahead "toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called [you] heavenward in Christ Jesus," (Philippians 3:14). God is a creative God, if you'll look around, you'll have to agree. God has designed something amazing for your life. Take some time, dream about it, get a picture of it in your mind's eye, write it down, and then go full force after it.

God's Promises and Nothing Less

Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know. ~ Jeremiah 33:3

That's what prayer is, what it does. It allows you to form a bond, a relationship, with the One who has the answers to everything. I was taught once that if there's something you want to know more about or do better, then you need to find people who are "in the know" and ask them about it. For example, if you want to have a better handle on your finances, then you should talk to people who are not in debt and are doing well. Just talking to someone who "appears" to be well of, but us under a mountain of debt will get you nowhere. Another example is for your marriage. If you and your spouse want to learn how to have a better marriage, hang out with couples you see who are doing it right, who seem to possess the qualities and traits you would like for your marriage.

When someone says, "I prayed and still don't have the answers," refer them to Matthew 7:7-8, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened." These verbs: ask, seek, and knock, are not just one time action words; they are verbs of continuous motion. We are to ask and keep on asking; we are to seek and keep on seeking; and we are to knock and keep on knocking. And we need to keep doing it until we have received everything that God has for us.

Almost three years ago, one of the pastors at our church gave a sermon called, "God's Rest." In his message, the pastor said, "whatever the bottom of the ladder is that you're gonna stay at is all you're gonna get from God," (Anderson, Alex 11/26/06). In other words, if you received a promise in your heart from God, but you give up before you have received the fullness of that promise or that vision, then that is where you will stay. If, however, you keep pushing and keep seeking and keep knocking on the doors of heaven, if you keep going after it, you will receive His promises.

One example comes from Genesis 32:25-29. Jacob had done some deceitful things, including stealing his brother's birth rite. Esau, Jacob's brother, called a meeting for the two of them and on the way there, Jacob stopped the night before they were to meet. That night, Jacob wrestled with a man all night. Even though the man demanded that Jacob let him go, Jacob said he would not until the man blessed him, which he did and gave him the name Israel, because he "struggled with God and with man" and overcame. When we go after something, sometimes God will "wrestle" with us to see how determined we are to receive it. It seems the bigger the blessing, the more we need to keep asking and keep seeking and keep knocking in order that we may receive the fullness of it.

A couple who was about to be married received a word from God that He would create a ministry through their marriage. Well, this couple wasn't married for very long before struggle after struggle after struggle beat upon their marriage like a relentless storm crashing waves upon the sand trying to break up the beach. In the middle of one such storm, the wife cried out to God, "You promised me that we would have a marriage ministry! I don't understand why this is happening! You promised me, and I will have nothing less!" That girl didn't settle--still hasn't. A few years later, God revealed to her that if she and her husband were to carry His message, they must first survive the mess. Today, the couple is impacting people for Jesus through different ministries at the church they attend. And while they are sharing God's message, they continuously ask, seek, and knock to ensure they will have the fullness of what God promised them.

You can have that, too, if you do not lose heart, if you do not give up, if you do not quit fighting. With everything in you, till there is nothing left, do not stop searching and seeking and calling out to God. Because it is then that He will reveal to you "great and unsearchable things you do not know."

Worthy

We are His portion and He is our prize...

Ever since I heard that line from the song "How He Loves," by David Crowder*Band, I've been running it through my mind. "We are His portion," what does that mean? Dictionary.com defines "portion" as "the part of the whole allotted to or belonging to a person." That sounds similar to the definition for sanctify. "Sanctify" means to "set apart for sacred use," (Standing Firm, Partow, 137). We are His portion...we are the part who God has set apart for His sacred use, His divine purposes. In Romans, Paul talks about who we are in relation to God: "Because those who are led by the spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. and by him we cry, 'Abba, Father,'" (8:14-15). We cry out to our heavenly Father, because that is what He is, our Father. He adopted us through the most expensive adoption ever and claimed us as His own (see Luke 23). In Romans 8, Paul continues to describe what this adoption means for us: "The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Now if we are children, the we are heirs--heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory," (16-17). Did you catch that? We are brothers and sisters, co-heirs and equals, with Christ. We are God's adopted kids and He loves us so much! If God is the King and we are His kids, then that makes us princes and princesses.

So why, then, do we not walk upright and proud, like we know who we are to our mighty King? I think it's because there is sin in the world and we allow lies from the devil to steal our true identity from us. In God's eyes, we are all like Superman, but I think we've believed the world's lie that we are only clumsy Clark Kent. We don't feel worthy enough to take on our true identity, so we have allowed ourselves to be conformed to the identity that the world says that we are. "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind," (Romans 12:2). That is not a request; it is a command. We must change what we believe and take on our true identities, the one that God gave us.

God designed and created us long before we were born. "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb," (Psalm 139:13). "Even the very hairs of your head are all numbered," (Matthew 10:30). "I have summoned you by name; you are mine," (Isaiah 43:1). Long before we were born, God knew how He wanted to design and create us. He birthed in us exactly what He would need to accomplish His will in this world. And through His adoption of us, we are co-heirs with Christ and "...we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord," (Romans 8:37-39).

We are God's kids. In our church, we say, "God loves you, but I'm His favorite." God sent His only Son to dies as a sacrifice so that He could adopt us, so we are His favorite. You don't need to feel unworthy any longer. God has made us worthy through the sacrifice of His Son, "it is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God-that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption," (1 Corinthians 1:30). Through Christ Jesus, we are the very definition of worthy. We are His righteous, worthy, portion.

Are You Afraid of Success?

Have you heard that before? Maybe somebody asked you? I always thought success was something everyone wanted and could more easily understand the fear of failure. Most often, the fear of failure causes one to give up before they start to avoid failing. The fear of success includes many things, one of which makes the person fearful that they will have no happiness upon achieving their accomplishments.

The Israelites in the Old Testament lost out on the Promise Land because of their fear of success. They had been promised this land for so long; it was promised to their forefathers. It's possible that when they were so close, they seized up and couldn't go on because they didn't know how to handle such a feat. Instead of celebrating and rushing in to take what was theirs, they stopped to examine the people inhabiting their land and decided to let fear overtake them. Out of that fear, they said, "All the people we saw are of great size...We seemed like grasshoppers in our own eyes, and we looked the same to them," (Numbers 13:32-33). At this point, there is nothing in the Bible to indicate that anyone in the land had seen those who were sent to scout it out. That means, their fear told them, "You are less than, and they will know it as soon as they see you. Stop now before you get killed." Because of their fear, they began to grumble and gripe. Have you ever been a part of a "gripe fest"? That's where all the people around you have a gripe about something and they begin to grumble about it and to "fit in," you join in. The Israelites did just that. They said, "If only we had died in Egypt! Or in this desert! Why is the Lord bringing us to this land only to let us fall by the sword?" (Numbers 14:2-3).

Out of everyone who was among the Israelite camp, why were Joshua and Caleb the only ones to enter the Promise Land? It was because they had learned how to take captive their thoughts and control their tongues and they said, "The land we passed through and explored is exceedingly good. If the Lord is pleased with us, he will lead us into the land...and will give it to us. Only do not rebel against the Lord. And do not be afraid of the people in the land, because we will swallow them up," (Numbers 14:7-9).

Ever heard of a "but God" moment before? I was listening to the radio a few years ago, not even sure who the announcers were talking about, but some speaker was coming into town and they were playing a clip from his show. And even though I didn't pay enough attention to determine who the speaker was, what he said really stuck with me. He said that at the end of every problem, perhaps when you are at your wit's end, add the phrase, "But God." The word "but" negates everything that came before it. Think about that for a moment. If God (and there's really no "if" about it) is the creator of everything, everything, and the ruler of the universe, wouldn't you want Him to have the last say on everything in your life? Take your marriage, for example. Let's say you and your spouse are in a fight, "but God..." and the possibilities are endless. How about this: You're not sure if your son is still following after Christ like he did when he was a child, "but God..." and you can trust in that. Your friend is sick, and the doctors don't know what the outcome will be, "but God..." and you know it's in the right hands. What was that song you sang when you were little... "He's got the whole world in His hands..."

So back to Caleb & Joshua. Why were they able to say, "Their protection is gone...Do not be afraid of them"? I think they were wiser than many of the others. I think they had a "but God" moment. They saw God as being bigger than one who would lead the way for a while, but then leave them once they arrived at "the destination," like some kind of tour guide. For them, God was "IT." They knew He was everything and that with Him there was nothing to fear.

Are you afraid of failure? Of success? Don't be. Add God to your every situation. That may sound easier said than done, but isn't that what faith is? Isn't faith adding God to your every situation and then just believing? "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen," (Hebrews 11:1). Instead of living by or out of fear, try living by faith and see how the things that you've hoped for will develop, and see what kind of "but God" moment you might have...

On Behalf of Our Husbands

If you're married, like I am, then you'll appreciate what I'm about to say. There are times in life, but especially in marriage, when the one you love the most is the one who frustrates you the most--occassionally causes you the most anxiety. This is not an attack on men, because I'm sure all husbands will have the same thought about their wives at some point or another. This is the cool part: The reason they frustrate us the most is because God designed them that way. No, He didn't design our men simply to frustrate us. God designed men to be men and not women. Here's why there's frustration or anxiety: we (the wives) can't make them do what we say--all the nagging in the world won't get us anywhere--or what we think they should do, or what we think they should desire to do for themselves.


The reading in today's The Word for You Today said, "Your anxiety is being caused by your thoughts and self-talk, not your partner or circumstances...Factor God in; He's the changer of hearts and minds. Lean on Him and He will lessen your anxiety and increase your peace and confidence!" (40). Look with me, at what Dictionary.com says about anxiety, "distress or uneasiness of mind caused by fear of danger or misfortune," (italics mine). The other day I talked briefly about what fear is: False Evidence Appearing Real. Let's break this down: If anxiety, which is fear, causes distress or uneasiness in your mind and fear is false evidence appearing real, then the real battle is won or lost in your mind. Whether you are aware of it, or not, we're at war and our battle is in the spiritual realm.


Three questions I'm sure you're asking: 1) Who are we fighting with? Ephesians 6:12 tells us that our fight is not against people we can see with human eyes, but our fight is against "authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." That's some scary stuff! That's more scary than all the horror flicks, combined. 2) What do we do in this battle? "We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ," (2 Cor. 10:5). What does that mean? It means that our enemy, the devil, who has only come to the earth to "steal and kill and destory," has been hard at work feeding you lies of various degrees and you need to know the Bible well enough to be able to recognize them as lies, (Jn 10:10). 3) How do we win? Are you ready for this? This is really cool! We need to take our Christ-given power and authority and destroy the devil. What do I mean "power and authority"? Let me show you. God has given us power of attorney, that is, He has given us the power to act in His name. God gave power of attorney to Christ and Christ gave power of attorney to us, (see God's Plan for Man by Finis Dake, 393-404). In Matthew 16:19, Jesus teaches us specifically how this works: I will give you the keys of the kingsdom of heaven; what ever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and what ever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven. The Greek word for "keys" means to "denote power and authority of various kinds." Jesus has given us the power to bind Satan and to "loose" or release the power of the Holy Spirit. When the verse says it will be done on earth as it is in heaven, it means the heavenly or spiritual realm.


What does all of that mean for us in reference to husbands and wives? It means that if there is something attacking our husbands, like sickness or depression, we have been given the authority to bind it up and send it packing back to the pits of hell. Two key things to remember when you are binding Satan: 1) always send him to the pits of hell; you don't want him releasing what you bound on someone else & 2) always fill up the void (see Matthew 12:43-45).


Let's pray for our husbands:

Lord, thank you that you have reminded me and have given me this authority. Satan, I speak directly to you: you have no power over my huband! You have no right to him. He is a child of God and he is protected by the blood of Jesus. My God has given me the keys of the kingdom of heaven and what ever is bound on earth is bound in heaven and what ever is loosed on earth is loosed in heaven. So Satan, I bind you up and I spit you out--with all of your demons--and send you back to the pits of hell. And angels of heaven and Holy Spirit, I loose you to come down and fill up my husband. Fill up every nook, cranny, crevis, void, hole, every spot that Satan or his legion might try to fill up. I pray right now, in Jesus' name, that if they ever do come back, that they will find it filled up. Thank you, Father God, that you have given us this authority through your Son, Jesus Christ. It is in His name that I pray, Amen.

Acknowledging Every Good Thing

That the communication of thy faith may become effectual by the acknowledging of every good thing which is in you in Christ Jesus. Philemon 6

Being a redhead--I mean a natural redhead--is a very unique thing. it requires a certain kind of personality that in-a-box redheads don't have. Different doctors have told me that being a redhead means I'll have certain "differences" from those with brown or even blond hair. For example, I have very fair skin and pretty much need to bathe in sunscreen before going outside. I have more sensitivities to medication, lower tolerance to pain, and for surgery, need more anesthesia.

More unique than just being a redhead is that I also have hazel eyes. Growing up, there were very few dolls or cartoon characters that had red hair and green eyes. The Little Mermaid has blue eyes, as did most of the dolls we would see. It almost became a game to my mom; she would buy any doll she would see that had red hair and green eyes. Having red hair and hazel eyes, I was even different from my immediate family. Neither set of grandparents, or my parents, or my brother have red hair and hazel eyes. A couple of them have blue and the rest have brown.

There were many times as a child that I didn't want to have red hair, mostly because kids will tease what's different. My mom will tell you that her perception of "red hair" was more like a bright orange. So, the entire time she was pregnant, she prayed that I would not have red hair. I guess God had other plans. Because I was a last-minute C-section, my mom didn't get to see me right away. She said the doctors first told her that I had red hair. But she said when she saw me, she thought I was the most beautiful baby. She said I was like a little doll.

Do you ever just giggle when you look back over a thing and realize that God was there and it was His plan the whole time? I giggle more when I realize all my fretting and "chasing my tail" didn't do me one ounce of good. All the prayers that my mom lifted up to God weren't according to His perfect plan so God gave me red hair anyway. The verse in Philemon 6 says that every good thing that is in me is for Christ's sake. For His purposes, I was born the way that I am. For His plans, I was given the gift of writing...which I always say, but really believe is something written by God and written down by me. For His desires, I was designed this way. Psalm 139:13 says, You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb. Everything about me, whether I currently like that part of me or not, God knew that it needed to be there, and so shaped me in such a way--knit me together--so that when He was finished, that thing that He desired, the part that He created would be a part of me. For Christ, I was designed; by God, I was made. Thank you, God, for every part of me. For every good part comes from You.

Not Just for Christmas Time

"Christmas time is here," or so goes the opening line of A Charlie Brown Christmas, my favorite Christmas show. I was watching clips from that movie the other night as I was doing research for a project for a friend of mine. I stopped and watched one of the last scenes. It was the scene where they were working on the Christmas play and, in a fit of frustration, Charlie Brown cried out, "Isn't there anyone who knows what Christmas is all about?" His friend said, "Sure, Charlie Brown, I can tell you what Christmas is all about." His friend, Linus, then told the story of the birth of Jesus, as depicted in the Book of Luke. When he finished, Linus said, "That's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown." At hearing what Linus had to say, Charlie Brown was satisfied, content even, and took his Christmas tree and went home.

Television networks only show that movie right before Christmas day. But I think the message is something we need to remember all year long. The underlying message is that it's not about presents, but rather it's about presence. There's a song that's popular on the radio right now called How He Loves, by David Crowder*Band, off their new album "Church Music." The opening lyrics of this song are, "He is jealous for me." That's a very revealing statement about our God. It tells me that He is more interested in the time I spend with Him than the time I spend doing things for Him. It's not that God wants me to stop serving Him or serving His body of believers. But He wants me to make sure that I'm spending just as much, if not more, time with Him as I am doing works for Him. On top of which, I don't want to get to heaven and have a resume filled with all the things I did for Him and have Him look at me and say, "I knew you not." Can you imagine how devastating that would be?

Last year, I lead a small group based on the book Standing Firm, by Donna Partow. In one of the chapters, Donna describes a woman going on a date with a handsome, young suitor. She described the scene as the couple sitting in a restaurant and the young man content with staring into the woman's eyes. The silence, however, makes the young woman nervous, so she finds anything and everything she can to fill up the silence. The author said that at the end of the evening, the young man went home and cried, because he was unable to share his love for her with all the chaos around them. The author said that God is the young suitor, who longs to tell us how much we mean to Him, but He won't do it amid all the chaos we put in our lives, (95). I find my life so ironic at times. I find that I learn the most about my God and hear the most from Him when I take the time to spend time alone with Him, and yet sometimes it seems the hardest thing for me to do. I'm fortunate that He will speak to me when I am crazy busy, but I know that I hear so much more when I dedicate time, more than 5 minutes, to reading His Word and listening for His voice.

In the beginning, He would speak to me, over me. What I mean is that the first time I know that I ever heard from God, I had been calling out to Him, over and over, "I want to hear from You. Let me hear Your voice." Over and over, that was what I said. So finally, He had to speak over me and He said, "Be quiet." I told this story to a few other people and they said, "Oh, you mean 'Be still and know that I am God.'" But that's not what He said. Maybe you can argue that it's the same thing, but for me, God was very straight and to the point. He said, "Be quiet." I often giggle about that time. Because for me, it was so profound, those two words, and at the same time, so simple. But God will do that. He'll take something that is so obvious and yet so foreign to our personalities to make His point. Take the story of Martha & Mary, for example.

I believe, even though the Bible says that they are two sisters, both Martha & Mary are two different personalities that each person has: the servant and the student. The Book of Luke tells the story of Martha & Mary. As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he had to say. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!" "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better and it will not be taken away from her," (Luke 10:38-42). The Lord said that Mary, the student, who sat at His feet, hanging on His every word, was the one who chose what was better. I can't show love through my actions until I have learned about love through spending time my God. There is a song we sang at First Wednesday that describes what I hear as Mary's, the other sister's, song. I want this to be my song, too.

The more I seek you, the more I find you.

The more I find you, the more I love you.

I want to sit at your feet, drink from the cup in your hands,

lay back against you and breath, feel your heart beat.

This love is so deep, it's more than I can stand.

I melt in your peace, it's overwhelming.